Taking the urn home - Is that allowed?

Losing a loved one is one of the most profound experiences in life. During this difficult time, many relatives are looking for a way to preserve the memory of the deceased in a particularly personal way. A common wish is to take home the urn with the deceased's ashes so that we can continue to maintain a close relationship.

What are the reasons to keep an urn?

The decision to keep an urn at home often has emotional and individual reasons:

• Proximity to the deceased: For many people, keeping the urn in their own home offers comfort and the feeling of continuing to be close to the deceased.
• Familiar environment: Especially when the deceased had a close connection to home, relatives find it consistent that the final resting place is also there.
• Afraid of anonymity: Some people want to avoid burying the deceased's ashes in a public place where they are difficult to reach.
• Alternative to classic cemetery burial: Not everyone feels connected to traditional forms of burial in a cemetery. To some, keeping the urn at home appears to be a more personal and individual form of remembrance.

But while this wish is understandable from a human perspective, the question is whether this is also legally possible. German legislation provides strict rules for handling mortal remains, which are explained in more detail in the following sections.

Traditions and rituals in other cultures

While there is a strict cemetery requirement for urns and coffins in Germany, there are significantly more liberal regulations in other countries:

• switzerland: Here, it is allowed to keep the urn with the deceased's ashes at home or to scatter it at a place of choice. Many Germans therefore opt for cremation in Switzerland in order to take advantage of this option.
• netherlands: Here, too, it is allowed to take the urn home or to organise an individual burial outside a cemetery.
• USA: In the United States, it is completely legal in most states to keep an urn at home or to scatter the ashes in a personal location.

These cultural differences show that the desire to keep a loved one's urn privately is recognized worldwide — even though legislation varies greatly from country to country.

Is it allowed to take the urn home?

In Germany, the handling of mortal remains is subject to strict legal requirements. While private storage of an urn is permitted in some other countries, the so-called Cemetery obligation. But what does that mean exactly, and are there any exceptions?

Cemetery obligation in Germany — What does that mean?

The cemetery obligation is firmly enshrined in German funeral law and states that deceased people — regardless of whether they are buried in a coffin or in an urn — in a cemetery or in designated burial sites must be buried.

The most important reasons for this legal requirement are:

• Dignity of the deceased: The cemetery obligation is intended to ensure that everyone receives an appropriate and respectful burial location.
• Hygienic and ethical aspects: The handling of mortal remains is subject to certain standards to prevent health risks and misuse.
• Legal protection: Storing urns in the private sector could lead to ambiguities about the right of ownership and the subsequent disposal of the remains.

The exact provisions on cemetery obligations are set out in the Funeral laws of the individual federal states regulated. However, in most cases, there is no way to permanently store an urn at home.

In which federal state can I take the urn home?

Since 2015, there has been an exception to the strict cemetery obligation in State of Bremen. Here, the funeral law has been amended so that, under certain conditions, it is permitted to bury the ashes of a deceased person outside a cemetery — for example on private property or in nature. However, storing the urn at home is still not fully permitted.

The most important requirements for burial outside the cemetery in Bremen:

• The deceased person must have been registered in Bremen.
• The deceased person must have expressly expressed this wish during his lifetime.
• Relatives must obtain permission from the competent authorities.
• The burial must be carried out with dignity and must not pose a threat to the environment or public order.

Other federal states have not yet introduced any comparable regulations. If you still want to take home an urn, you often search for Alternatives, such as a funeral abroad.

Regulations in other European countries

While Germany adheres to the strict cemetery obligation, there are more liberal funeral laws in many other European countries:

• switzerland: Here, it is easily possible to store an urn at home or to scatter the ashes at a freely chosen location.
• netherlands: In the Netherlands, too, relatives can keep an urn at home. No approval is required.
• spain: There is no general cemetery requirement for urns in Spain. Families can keep the urn at home or scatter the ashes somewhere important to them.

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